How can I make it last? That’s not happiness, that’s addiction.
– Anthony De Mello
The desires make us unhappy, but does this mean we have to delete our desires and just be happy?
The Buda said: The suffering comes from the desires we have. It’s hard to be and stay happy when you don’t have what you want.
Of Course if you feel you have enough and you are okay with what you have, you will be happier. But we should ask ourselves, is this way of living my life the way i want it to be? Do I value happiness over achievement? What are your values, what do you believe life is all about ? Do you think suffering is necessary in life, so we can accomplish our desires and goals in life? Is the mental state of yours more important than the large big goals, purpose you have?
Lastly.. is happiness the ultimate human goal and is it possible to be happy all the time? Happiness is important, but when we look in the past humans were almost never constantly happy. This doesn’t mean we should not strive to be happier, but we may need to sacrifice a bit of our personal happiness and do what may not make us happy now in the moment, but it will in the future.
Neglecting our personal happiness in the short term is necessary sometimes, but our long term happiness may not be. But expecting to be happy all the time as this never has been the case in human history, it’s utopia. Although we should try to overcome suffering in human life. Some of the suffering is necessary and some it’s unnecessary.
Modern society it’s in a situation where happiness is mostly neglected. We are focused on our personal financial gain, which to achieve sometimes you should neglect short-term happiness. Neglecting short-term happiness however, becomes long-term.
Balance..
We all know balance is the key, but for the most part human beings are not necessarily good at keeping it. We are addictive creatures. We get to do more of what we already do instead of balancing the opposites.
We need balance between suffering – happiness, none of the two alone is good in my personal experience. I believe people accept the idea of suffering to be necessary for your happiness. Suffering is not always good or bad. Sometimes suffering leads to growth and sometimes leads to death.
Trauma could make you grow like a person and make you stronger, but sometimes it can be too much and make you take your own life.
There’s no simple answer in how humans should live their lives, what goals, values etc.. to have, what is the meaning of life and is it the same for all human beings or is personal. I would argue it’s both.
Finally..
Knowing what you are willing to suffer for is the question you may need to answer.
